........tumhare hisse ki zindgi

Swadesh Deepak ke liye.....jinke jaane ke baad hum anaath ho gaye.






maine apne hisse ki zindgi jee
aur tumhare hisse ki mej(table)pe rakh di
usi mej pe
jispe alarm,dher saare kagaz,tumhare kaano ki baaliyan,napkin aur tumhari purse bikhri padi hui hai..
wahan ek guldasta hai jo mej pe nahi calender pe bana hai
calender mein kuch taarikhein hai
aur taarikhon ke bahut karib
tumhari lipistics ke kai shades
jo apne nishano(n) mein
kabhi gahre to kabhi halke hote rahte hain.










ye lo tumhare hisse ki zindgi
main tumhari gardan ke paas aake phusphusaya....
khusbooo thi wahan....
tum kuch nahi boli to maine khusboo se kaha..
agar main mar gaya to...
khusboo boli tum kyon maroge?
maroongi agar?..to pahle main..

tum chillayee..
tum meri gardan ke paas aake itni tej saansein kyon lete ho..
maine kaha
saanse thodi thi..
socha tumhare jaane se pahle saari le loon...
tumne kaha
tumhari baatein meri samajh mein nahi aati










maine kaha
baaton ki nahi saanso ki baat ho rahi hai
aur tumne dheere se mujhe dhakela
door hato
kyon?
mujhe achcha nahi lagta
kya?

tum chup rahi
aur mujhe laga
jaise calender ke guldaste mein ek bargad ug haaya ho

us bargad ke neeche chhaon thi....
wahan ek taarikh ki kurshi thi
aur hum dono
usi ek kursi mein saalon se baithe hain.










na tum mujhse kuch kahti ho
na main tumse
dar hai
kahin bargad jheena na ho jaye
aur hame dhoop lagni shuru ho jaaye.

jab hum chup hote hain
jab hum apne hisse ki zindgi jee rahe hote hai
bina garm saanson ki parwah ke
hum ek kursi par
ek hi bargad ke neeche
zindgi ki saari dhoopon ko nazarandaaz kar dete hain

to
tabhi
pankhe ki hawa se calender udta hai
aur usme bana bargad jheena ho jaata hai
taarikh pe tiki hamari kursi toot jaati hai
aise mein GULDASTA hans ke kahta hai
jee chuke apne hisse ki Zindgi?











aur main kahta hoon...
na JEE CHUKA GULDASTE KE HISSE ki zindgi....
to jao ab apni jiyo.........
ab main hansa....
kaun jee paya hai apne hisse ki Zindgi
phir...
SAB KAAT-TE hain apne hisse ki Zindgi.

achanak calender
pankhe ki hawa se tej phadphadane laga
aur taarikhein
mej pe jharke bikharne lagi..
har jagah
alarm,kagaz ke tukdon,tumhari baaliyon,napkin aur tumhare purse pe bhi.
wahan jahan tumhare hisse ki zindgi thi.

...it's not done................................

wong-karwai aur jiang-wen ke liye.....

mere khauf hain
mere apne sapne....
khuli aankhon ke sapne nahi
balki band aankhon ke.

pasri hui raat ho
ya pasra hua din
kya fark padta hai?
sirf aankein band honee chahiye...
aur mauzu munasib ho
to zindgi khauf-jada ho jaati hai.

ek aisi duniya ka kaayal hun main
jo kahin nahi milti
tamam baar feri waalon se poocha hai
ai tum!kabhi us duniya mein koi saamaan bechne gaye ho?
aur sab apni tokariyan utha kar bhaag khade hote hain.


main sawal nahi karta
kyonki zindgi sawal ka kabhi mauka nahi deti
wo kaan kheechti hai
chhoti-chhoti galtiyon pe...
thappad maarti hai..
meri aana-kaniyon pe
aur tamam baar
mehmaano ke saamne mera mazak udati hai.

aur main saari platein
mej-posh par lagata rahta hun
chup-chaap...
aankhon mein do suiyan chubhti rahti hain
aur aksar kuch boondein khadi ho jaati hai
aise jaise unhe
wahan se nikalne ki jaldi ho.



kal yun hi
ghar ki buhar lagate waqt
ek boodhi aurat gujri saamne se
parde ka oat tha
par jheene parde se kya nahi dikh jaata hai
kai-kai zindgiyan
pardon ke peeche lagi rahti hain
ki aaj nahi to kal
parde ka oat zarur milega
khair wo aurat maniharan thi
un dinon ki uski umar
jab gharon mein daadiyan
bahuein banke aayee thin..
uske haathon mein chaandi ke tediya
pairon mein sher bhar wajan ke kade
gale mein hansuli
aur haathon mein?
kuch nahi
wo choodiyan bechti hai



meri taraf dekh ke muskurai
kaha ye
idhar kya kar raha hai?
main dar gaya
kaun ho tum?
mujhe nahi pahchana.!!!!
nahi..
maine teri bahu ko choodiyan pahnayee thi...
kab?
dariya ki umar se pahle
ek toofan aaya tha
agar tujhe yaaad ho..
us toofan ke aane se pahle.
maine kaha
tum pagal ho...
wo khilkhilayee
mat bol
teri bahu boli thi..
aaj bhi dariya jab bahti hai
to charwahe uske rone ki aawaj sunte hain

main dara nahi
maine daanta use
kis duniya ki baat kar rahi ho?
hamari...
dariya ...ke paar Toofan ke aane se pahle
tab main kahan tha?
tum kashti leke dariya ke paar gaye the
kya karne?
tab tum ZINDGIYON ka sauda karte the..

tumhari bahu ghar pe thi
wo haamla thi
aur main use choodiyan pahnaane aayi thi
tum tab bhi choodiyan pahnaati thi..
tum bhi to
tab se aaj-tak
zindgiyon ka sauda karte ho!
wo khilkhilayee
aur uski tokri mein rakhi saari choodiyan
rone lagee..

tum yahan mujhe darane aayee ho?
naa
tumhe aagah karne..
kis baat ka??..
yahi ki
kal teri bahu ne
kisi charwahe ki bhed(SHEEP)
gaayab kar dee
aur wo tab se roye jaa raha hai
to main kya karun
use jaake kaho
bhed wapas kar de
nahi to toofan phir se wapas aayega...
wo phir hansi..
aur tokri ki saari choodiyan rone lagi
main nahi jaaunga...
chahe kuch bhi ho jaaye
tujhe jaana padega
na gaya to
toofan aayega!
meri bala se...
tujhe phir dariya mein kashti utaarni padegi
zindgiyon ka shauda karne jaana padega
phir toofan ke baad ki duniya
jaisi ki taisi ho jaayegi
aur phir main teri haamla bahu ko choodiyan pahnaane aaungi.

main maare dar ke kaamp raha tha...
aisa kaise ho sakta hai
ye daayan hogi...wo boli
tum phir galti kar rahe ho...
abhi dariya mein ghaas ug aayee hai
wahan bilkul paani nahi hai
saare patthar
dariya ke kinare
kaagaz ki tarah udte rahte hain


aur kai baar
bhedon ki peeth par baith ke
unhe chhot pahuchate hain.
unse kaho
wo
wahan se utrein
ghaas pighalne waali hai
aur saari dariya
ghaas ke pighalte hee barf se dhak jaayegi


meri aankhon me suiyan chubhni shuri ho gayee
dhaage phir lambe ho gaye
usne kaha
keemat do
kis cheez ki?
teri bahu ne meri teen choodiyan tod dee thi

mere paas kuch bhi nahi hai
main gidgidaya
to teen zindgiyan de... kaise doon..?
mujhe nahi maloom
teri duniya
tere log
teri zindgi
mujhe keemat chahiye...!!!
maine kaha........mujhe wapas karegi?
usne kaha kya?
dariya!
uske pahle ka toofan
aur meri D............dddddddddd

wo khilkhilayeee
aur tokri mein rakhi saari choodiyan rone lagi...
usne kaha...
dariya mein ghaas pighalni shuru ho gayi...
ab phir toofan aayega...
.usne tokri kee kuch choodiyan khaa lee...
aur uske pairon ke neeche ki ghaas pighalni shuru ho gayi
wo doob gayi..
par choodiyon ke rone ki aawaj lagaataar badhti ja rahi hai.

....phone ki ghanti baji
haan.....
1-6 office mein meeting hai
aajka lunch cancle
main raat mein phone karungi
khaana kha lena
luv u
luv u 2

...........aur tumne phone kaat diya tha.

Dr Neeraj Kumar ke liye..........



main apne aap se woob gaya hun....
aisa socha nahi
mujhe aisa laga.

baahar aaya
aur tumhe phone laga diya
tumne phone kaat diya
bheetar wapas gaya
aur phir laga
main apne aap se woob gaya hun.

ab tak tumhara phone aa gaya
haan kya baat thi?
pahle socha na kahun
phir socha kyon na kahun?
tum kahti rahti ho
mujhe har cheez bata diya karo
aur maine kah diya
main khud se woob gaya hun!!

paagal ho gaye ho?
nahi to
phir aisa kyon sochte ho?
kaisa?
ki apne se woob gaya hun?
kitne paaglon ko jaanti ho
jo apne se woob gaye hain?

dekho
tumhari ghanti aayi thi
main kuch zaruri kaam kar rahi thi
kaat di
phir socha
shaayad tumne kisi zaruri kaam se phone kiya ho?
isliye dobara se kar liya
to kaat do!
kya?
phone!


















kyon?
maine kuch bhi zaruri batane ke liye phone nahi kiya tha?

tum chhoti see baat ka bura maante ho
maine kab maana?
abhi!
naa
main to apne aap se woob gaya hun
socha....sabse pahle tumhe bata doon....






kal mujhse aake milo
sab sahi ho jaayega
kuch kharab kab hua?
jo theek hoga
zindgi waisee kee waisee hai.

tumne shave kee!
nahi.
kyon?
har paanch minute mein badh jaati hai.
kal mujhse milne aate waqt karoge?
nahi....nahi karoonga.
belt bhi nahi lagaoonga
bilkul taiyaar nahi hoonga...

kyon?
duniya achchi nahi lagti kya?
achchi lagti hai!
kai baar bahut achchi lagti hai..
uske paas naukri hai
formal shirts hain
tie hai
polishd joote hain
polishd language hai
combed hair hai













style hai..
bolne,chalne aur behave karne ki.

tumhare paas bhi to ye saari cheezen hain!
tum hans dee
naa maine saari utaar ke kone mein rakh dee hai....
tum aur tej hansi
tum poore paagal ho...
main paagal hota to apne se kaise woobta?

faaltu baatein baad mein
kal tum mujhse milne aa rahe ho..bas!
bas!....aur tumne phone kaat diya.

phone ki ghanti baj rahi thi
utha ke phone kaan pe lagaya..
tumne daanta.....
kitni der se tumhara phone try kar rahi hoon?
ek baar mein uthate kyon nahi ho..
mujhe jhapki aa gayi thi......
shaam ke 4 baje hee tumhe jhapki aati hai..
achcha bhaag ke aao..
main tumhe kisi se milwana chahti hoon....
D......dddddddddd
main kuch nahi sunna chahti....
aur haan SHAVE karke aana.

aur tumne phone kaat diya tha.

sawalon ki marzi nahi hoti...........

aakshie aur 2b ke liye..........









aaj shaam kai duniya ke log ikatthe hue
achchi
aur alag baat yeh thi
ki sabki apni duniya thi.



koi kisi ki duniya mein nahi tha
kisi ke bharose nahi
koi saath nahi
aur ghanton koi baat nahi.

phir talkhi tooti
mujhe laga
abhi baat hogi
sab baat karenge
cheezen khulengi
koi apnapan layega
koi parayepan mein chutkiyan lega
phir hansi hogi
thatthe honge
aur mausam ka mizaz badlega.

aisa kuch bhi nahi hua..
pahle ne bolne se mana kiya
doosre ne nazrein milane se
teesre ne naak sikodi
chauthe ne bhauyein marodi
phir baaki ke sabne peeth dikha di.




maine socha
sabne aisa kyon kiya
kya unke paas kahne ko sachmuch kuch nahi tha?
aisa tha agar
to unke ishaare?
unke chehre ?
chup hone chahiye ..
sab to bol rahe the..
.siwaye unke honton ke?

koi bada sawal nahi hai?
to koi bada jawab bhi nahi hoga shaayad?
zindgiyan beet jaati hain
aur hum ek-doosre ki taraf
peeth kiye baithe rahte hain
is intzaar mein ki abhi wo kuch poochega
aur hum uska jawab denge?



hum saalon tak chup rahte hain
saalon tak intzaar karte hain
ek mauke ki talash mein
jab hum apni marzi ka jawab denge....

sawalon ki marzi nahi hoti
sawal karne walon ki bhi marzi nahi hoti
wo be-marzi ke
bune jaate hain
pooche jaate hain
is tark ke saath
ki wo shaayad sawal hone ki keemat chuka rahe hain
ek prayschit....
gaddhe jaane ka..
bune jaane ka..
kuredne ka..
talashne ka.
.aur phir takleef dene ka!
sawalon ke ant mein ek takleef.


shaam mein saare log
aise kai sawalon ko bunte hue
ek doosre ki taraf peeth kiye
chup-chaap baithe rahe
is talash mein
ki sabki baari aayegi
sabke sawal aayeinge
aur phir
sabke jawab.
shaayad yahi wajah thi
aaj shaam koi kisi se kuch nahi bola
ye alag baat hai
aaj shaam kai duniya ke log ikathhe hue.

.....beeti raat SHIMLE mein barf padi thi

anurag kashyap aur 2b ke liye--

main aksar is sadak pe aake
khada hota hoon
phir palat ke dekhta hun
us sadak ki taraf
jispe tangi takhti pe likha hai
ye sadak aage nahi jaati.


sadak wahi hai
jispe main khada hun
sirf muh modne bhar se
likha padhne mein aata hai
ki sadak aage nahi jaati.

fir saamne dekhta hun
usi sadak ki taraf
jispe bina likhe
padhne mein aata hai
ye sadak zindgi ki taraf jaati hai.

cigarette jalata hun
kahin koi galti hui
ya galat raashte pe aake khada ho gaya.

seene mein dard uthta hai
khaansi aati hai
jaise tumne jore ki thaap seene pe maari ho
aur main bolta hun
aise nahi maarte
mera dil kamzor hai
aur tum hansti ho
dil kamzor hai?
aur mujhse ISHQ karte ho?

maine kaha
dil ka kamzor hona ishq ki pahli shart hai?
cigarette bujh gayi kya?
ya muh mein ab tak nahi lagayi
jalayee bhi?
dibbi mein thee bhi
jeb mein haath bhi daala kya?
nikali wahan se?

khair jeb mein
us dibbi mein
aakhri cigarette thi
wo bhi tooti thi
maachis ki teeli ka masala toota tha
shaayad jalata to bhi na jalti

over-coat ko tatola
poori tarah se bheeg gaya hun
thandi hawa bhi hai
aur toofan bhi
shaayad shimle mein barf padi hogi ?
shaayad!
tum apne hotel ke kamre se nikal ke
reception pe aayee hogi
shikayat karne
ki A.C kamra garm kyon nahi kar raha.?

over-coat phir tatoli
kaafi barf jama thi..
poori coat Shimle se jyada barfeeli thi.
par badan bheeg raha tha
pasheene se lathpath

tumne dawayein lee
neeli waali goli?
hari to subah khaani thi....
safed wali tab..
aur Laal wali?
tum khud se kha lena
tab main shimle mein hoongi

phone kar dena?
nahi kar paungi..
kyon?
ab tum kamati ho?
shimle mein phone nahi hai kya?
ya tumhe fikr nahi ?
ki mujhe dawa khaani hai?

koi jawab nahi
san-nataaaa
thode aansooo
subkiyan
bus.

bheed jama thi
subah ki talkhi thi
raat ko giri barf pighal rahi thi
log over-coat mein haath daale
ikat-tha the.

ek ne doosre ko aawaj di
kya hua?
dosra door se chillaya
koi mar gaya hai?
kahan?
SADAK AAGE NAHI JAATI WAALE LAMP POST KE NEECHE.

pahla bola...
THANDH SE MARA HOGA.
doosra bola..
beeti raat SHIMLE mein barf padi thi.

...jab bahut der tak HIROSHIMA nahi aaya

jab bahut der tak HIROSHIMA nahi aaya
DR. ASHOK CHAKRADHAR aur TWO-B ke liye.......tumne meri aankhein cheen leeaur mujhse kahaudhar jaake khade ho jao jahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.main bahut der takek takusi raah pebina nigah ke khada thakyonki tumne kaha thaudhar jaake khade ho jaojahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.HIROSHIMA nahi aayegaek bachcha chillataseeti bajata nikal gaya.phir ek jawan aadmi apni cycle se pareshaan aadmiapni utri chain kochadhane ke baad bolaHIROSHIMA nahi aayegaaur phir ghanti bajata nikal gaya.phir ek ladki gujri shaayar thi woshaayad...gunguna rahi thigungunate hue boli HIROSHIMA nahi aayega.main pareshaan hairaanagar HIROSHIMA nahi aayato jaunga kahan.aankhein nahi hainapna shaher nahi haiapne log nahi hainaur tumne kaha thaudhar jaake khade ho jaojidhar HIROSHIMA aanewala hai.HIROSHIMA nahi aaya aur sadiyan beet gayeinlogon ne kahna shuru kiyatum bhi kiski baaton mein ulajh gayekisi ladki ki kya?achanak sannata cha gayakisi ladki ki kya?aawaj goonjti rahikaano tak daud ke aatiphir sarpat chali jaatikisi ladki ki kya?mujhe yaad aayeewo shaamshadiyon pahlejab aankhein cheenne ke baadtumne kaha tha udhar jaake khade ho jaojidhar HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.maine apne badan ko tatolajism ko pahchanne ki koshish kiwo wahi nahi thakuch bhi to nahi thasiwayeus ek ret(sand)ke teele kejo achanak tatolne se dhasak karbaaloo ki tarahbikhar gaya.tumne mujhse jhoot kyon bolaapne se alag kyon kiyaaankhein kyon cheeni merius raashte pe le jaake kyon khada kiyajo tumse door thaus raashte se door thajidhar se HIROSHIMA gujraaur tumhe leke chala gaya.duniya sahi thi apni jagahwo ladki ko kabhi pahchaan nahi saktius ladki ko jo jab-jab HIROSHIMA gujrato bina bataye uske saath chali gayi.ek aadmi ko baalu ke teele pe khada kar ke.haan HIROSHIMA sadiyon mein ek baar aata haiaur wo ladki uske saath bina bataye chali jaati hai.aur main us ladki se pyar karta hoon.
DR. ASHOK CHAKRADHAR aur TWO-B ke liye.......

tumne meri aankhein cheen lee
aur mujhse kaha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.

main bahut der tak
ek tak
usi raah pe
bina nigah ke
khada tha
kyonki tumne kaha tha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.

HIROSHIMA nahi aayega
ek bachcha chillata
seeti bajata
nikal gaya.

phir ek jawan aadmi
apni cycle se pareshaan aadmi
apni utri chain ko
chadhane ke baad bola
HIROSHIMA nahi aayega
aur phir ghanti bajata nikal gaya.

phir ek ladki gujri
shaayar thi wo
shaayad...
gunguna rahi thi
gungunate hue boli HIROSHIMA nahi aayega.

main pareshaan
hairaan
agar HIROSHIMA nahi aaya
to jaunga kahan.
aankhein nahi hain
apna shaher nahi hai
apne log nahi hain
aur tumne kaha tha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jidhar HIROSHIMA aanewala hai.

HIROSHIMA nahi aaya aur sadiyan beet gayein
logon ne kahna shuru kiya
tum bhi kiski baaton mein ulajh gaye
kisi ladki ki kya?

achanak sannata cha gaya
kisi ladki ki kya?
aawaj goonjti rahi
kaano tak daud ke aati
phir sarpat chali jaati
kisi ladki ki kya?

mujhe yaad aayee
wo shaam
shadiyon pahle
jab aankhein cheenne ke baad
tumne kaha tha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jidhar HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.

maine apne badan ko tatola
jism ko pahchanne ki koshish ki
wo wahi nahi tha
kuch bhi to nahi tha
siwaye
us ek ret(sand)
ke teele ke
jo achanak tatolne se dhasak kar
baaloo ki tarah
bikhar gaya.

tumne mujhse jhoot kyon bola
apne se alag kyon kiya
aankhein kyon cheeni meri
us raashte pe le jaake kyon khada kiya
jo tumse door tha
us raashte se door tha
jidhar se HIROSHIMA gujra
aur tumhe leke chala gaya.

duniya sahi thi apni jagah
wo ladki ko kabhi pahchaan nahi sakti
us ladki ko
jo jab-jab HIROSHIMA gujra
to bina bataye uske saath chali gayi.

ek aadmi ko baalu ke teele pe khada kar ke.
haan HIROSHIMA sadiyon mein ek baar aata hai
aur wo ladki uske saath bina bataye chali jaati hai.
aur main us ladki se pyar karta hoon.

...magar gila na karein.

I loved Kateel Shifai(Pakistan) when I was a kid..
ANANDANA KAPOOR ke liye..jiski aawaz mein mere dard ko jazb karne ki taakat hai.....

WO dil hi kya jo tere milne ki dua na kare
main tujhe bhool ke zinda rahoon khuda na kare
rahega tera pyar saath zindgi ban-kar,
ye aur baat meri zindgi wafa na kareye
yeh theek hai nahi marta koi judai mein
khuda kisi se kisi ko magar juda na kare

suna hai unki mohabbat duayein deti hain
jo dil mein chot to khayein magar gila na karein