....In the dead of night

"2b"......r u listening me?...den dis one 4 u.....
IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT.....
when the world was snoring,sneezing and seducing
i was taking a chance from falling asleep.


no reason....,no rhyme
no one was even crying......
A sprain that i got yesterday
which hurts me now....
Then a sprain that i got ages back
which hurts me even more
I never see sprains to be of any use
though 'hurts' carry some significance.

Then while strumming a guitar
a simple bruise makes a scar....
why is the skin so thin?...
can't carry a bruise ......a scar

In the dead of night...
when i try to 'woo' her...
something significant
which pays me nothing but a 'hope'
when i try to draw her...
something more significant
which pays me nothing but a 'sure'
that i have a ''notion''
which is still not dead
that creeps in cob-webs
that sweats in cocoons
that stinks in hay-straws
though i don't believe..
that i can hear it,smell it or feel it...
but yeah.......i fear it
when she says it’s not there...
in cob-webs,cocoons or in hay-straws
but here in abstractions...........
i see no need to fear now
i see no need to tremble now
though i'm still fearing.......
,though i'm still trembling
so what if one day?......
in the dead of night
i try to close my eyes and..
she hesitates to knock at the eye -lids...................................................

now i'm trembling even more.
i'm falling asleep..
eyes wide open
a notion......
that i want to grow old with you
without spouting a sentence
what a butter cutting notion..?
which at dead of night
starts turning in to an abstraction..
an "ABSTRACT-NOTION"

............few imaginary lines
triangles,circles and rectangles
when they float........they float
when they merge.....they merge..
unbridled..............unapprehensive
they never come at a point
they never shake their heads...
in affirmation.....
they never confirm what they are looking for?...
a toast
a cheer
a melancholy
a morose
nothing which is 'sure'
If angina is there in the heart
if things are diagnosed' as they are'
if palpation stops for a second
a 'dejavu' for 'real'
i will never breathe again..
though i can hear the doctors shouting at nurses...
though i can experience the ward-boy...
taking away my wrist-watch
though i can feel the 'drips'.......
running in to my pulses
though a junior has removed it ages before
nothing makes unhappy
though thousands are there to chill the bones.

when they came with a shroud
they were sober
they did what they were good at
they were in a hurry..
presumably the runners of a Marathon
everything was clean
so what if they were in a hurry?
alright he is dead...
burn him before the sunset
nobody has to come from another country
that is past
but why are his eyes open...?
he pointed at..
that extra-terrestrial(E.T)one
now no eyes were there at the corpse
like sunken stomatas
they were in an effort to pop-out
to make a position away from the periphery..
bleary-eyed
blasphemous
bandits in the guise of clowns
in a slow motion
approaching eyes
shouting slogans 'close it' or 'snatch it'
they were rigid in their faces....
compassion and streaks dried since ages..
ear- drums still vibrating..
ear-pinnae still twitching
but diaphragms got ruptured
ear-juice got dried
noise had its own voice
i was frozen
far below freezing point
unnerved
claustrophobic.

In the dead of night
when a twilight blinks in the mind
when a viper slips in the fist
i'm here outside
to verify if dead or alive
the mind peeps inside a pool of dead cockroaches
to assure
does narcissism really exist?
do popes still buy a stake in love?
do monopolies still rule the feelings on this earth?
so what if an E.T comes with an extended hand
i have gothic notions with an extended hand
to surmise the birth of abstractions...
in the dead of night........
......
yesterday when i was drunk
today when i'm sober
if i give a second thought to liquid
i didn't change at all
but you always remain what you are..
in the dead of night with a lot of moon sighs
when i feel i'm wedded to life
do you feel i'm still in love with you
when notions are ready to grease my palm
when abstractions have developed their own arms
still mind detests an ambush...
may be its my own fault....
may be i'm crippled
rolling in a wheel chair..............
so i need an ego ,which has taken a backseat
to make me feel comfortable
whenever twi-light blinks
to push me down a slope
though i know i have nothing to offer you.....
except a back-seat
to detour me from
what life has to offer me.
Its not a challenge
never take it as a challenge
don't set parameters for a walk
don't set alarms for a mental block
nothing is biological.............
neither my existence......,nor yours
not even an umbilical -chord.

In the dead of night
when the E.T murmurs
i know the slope is now being leveled
the ear juice has no tract to follow
now,a murmur echoes only twice
once for NOTION
once for ABSTRACTION.

One day in the dead of
when everything will be alright
when eyes will remain wide open
wanting to give you a smooth motion
when the world will repeat sneezing,snoring and seducing
believe me.....................................................................................................
i won't be there
neither in cob-webs,cocoons,hey-straws
nor in the wheel-chair
but always there
in ABSTRACTIONS and NOTION...............
only IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT.

........tumhare hisse ki zindgi

Swadesh Deepak ke liye.....jinke jaane ke baad hum anaath ho gaye.






maine apne hisse ki zindgi jee
aur tumhare hisse ki mej(table)pe rakh di
usi mej pe
jispe alarm,dher saare kagaz,tumhare kaano ki baaliyan,napkin aur tumhari purse bikhri padi hui hai..
wahan ek guldasta hai jo mej pe nahi calender pe bana hai
calender mein kuch taarikhein hai
aur taarikhon ke bahut karib
tumhari lipistics ke kai shades
jo apne nishano(n) mein
kabhi gahre to kabhi halke hote rahte hain.










ye lo tumhare hisse ki zindgi
main tumhari gardan ke paas aake phusphusaya....
khusbooo thi wahan....
tum kuch nahi boli to maine khusboo se kaha..
agar main mar gaya to...
khusboo boli tum kyon maroge?
maroongi agar?..to pahle main..

tum chillayee..
tum meri gardan ke paas aake itni tej saansein kyon lete ho..
maine kaha
saanse thodi thi..
socha tumhare jaane se pahle saari le loon...
tumne kaha
tumhari baatein meri samajh mein nahi aati










maine kaha
baaton ki nahi saanso ki baat ho rahi hai
aur tumne dheere se mujhe dhakela
door hato
kyon?
mujhe achcha nahi lagta
kya?

tum chup rahi
aur mujhe laga
jaise calender ke guldaste mein ek bargad ug haaya ho

us bargad ke neeche chhaon thi....
wahan ek taarikh ki kurshi thi
aur hum dono
usi ek kursi mein saalon se baithe hain.










na tum mujhse kuch kahti ho
na main tumse
dar hai
kahin bargad jheena na ho jaye
aur hame dhoop lagni shuru ho jaaye.

jab hum chup hote hain
jab hum apne hisse ki zindgi jee rahe hote hai
bina garm saanson ki parwah ke
hum ek kursi par
ek hi bargad ke neeche
zindgi ki saari dhoopon ko nazarandaaz kar dete hain

to
tabhi
pankhe ki hawa se calender udta hai
aur usme bana bargad jheena ho jaata hai
taarikh pe tiki hamari kursi toot jaati hai
aise mein GULDASTA hans ke kahta hai
jee chuke apne hisse ki Zindgi?











aur main kahta hoon...
na JEE CHUKA GULDASTE KE HISSE ki zindgi....
to jao ab apni jiyo.........
ab main hansa....
kaun jee paya hai apne hisse ki Zindgi
phir...
SAB KAAT-TE hain apne hisse ki Zindgi.

achanak calender
pankhe ki hawa se tej phadphadane laga
aur taarikhein
mej pe jharke bikharne lagi..
har jagah
alarm,kagaz ke tukdon,tumhari baaliyon,napkin aur tumhare purse pe bhi.
wahan jahan tumhare hisse ki zindgi thi.

...it's not done................................

wong-karwai aur jiang-wen ke liye.....

mere khauf hain
mere apne sapne....
khuli aankhon ke sapne nahi
balki band aankhon ke.

pasri hui raat ho
ya pasra hua din
kya fark padta hai?
sirf aankein band honee chahiye...
aur mauzu munasib ho
to zindgi khauf-jada ho jaati hai.

ek aisi duniya ka kaayal hun main
jo kahin nahi milti
tamam baar feri waalon se poocha hai
ai tum!kabhi us duniya mein koi saamaan bechne gaye ho?
aur sab apni tokariyan utha kar bhaag khade hote hain.


main sawal nahi karta
kyonki zindgi sawal ka kabhi mauka nahi deti
wo kaan kheechti hai
chhoti-chhoti galtiyon pe...
thappad maarti hai..
meri aana-kaniyon pe
aur tamam baar
mehmaano ke saamne mera mazak udati hai.

aur main saari platein
mej-posh par lagata rahta hun
chup-chaap...
aankhon mein do suiyan chubhti rahti hain
aur aksar kuch boondein khadi ho jaati hai
aise jaise unhe
wahan se nikalne ki jaldi ho.



kal yun hi
ghar ki buhar lagate waqt
ek boodhi aurat gujri saamne se
parde ka oat tha
par jheene parde se kya nahi dikh jaata hai
kai-kai zindgiyan
pardon ke peeche lagi rahti hain
ki aaj nahi to kal
parde ka oat zarur milega
khair wo aurat maniharan thi
un dinon ki uski umar
jab gharon mein daadiyan
bahuein banke aayee thin..
uske haathon mein chaandi ke tediya
pairon mein sher bhar wajan ke kade
gale mein hansuli
aur haathon mein?
kuch nahi
wo choodiyan bechti hai



meri taraf dekh ke muskurai
kaha ye
idhar kya kar raha hai?
main dar gaya
kaun ho tum?
mujhe nahi pahchana.!!!!
nahi..
maine teri bahu ko choodiyan pahnayee thi...
kab?
dariya ki umar se pahle
ek toofan aaya tha
agar tujhe yaaad ho..
us toofan ke aane se pahle.
maine kaha
tum pagal ho...
wo khilkhilayee
mat bol
teri bahu boli thi..
aaj bhi dariya jab bahti hai
to charwahe uske rone ki aawaj sunte hain

main dara nahi
maine daanta use
kis duniya ki baat kar rahi ho?
hamari...
dariya ...ke paar Toofan ke aane se pahle
tab main kahan tha?
tum kashti leke dariya ke paar gaye the
kya karne?
tab tum ZINDGIYON ka sauda karte the..

tumhari bahu ghar pe thi
wo haamla thi
aur main use choodiyan pahnaane aayi thi
tum tab bhi choodiyan pahnaati thi..
tum bhi to
tab se aaj-tak
zindgiyon ka sauda karte ho!
wo khilkhilayee
aur uski tokri mein rakhi saari choodiyan
rone lagee..

tum yahan mujhe darane aayee ho?
naa
tumhe aagah karne..
kis baat ka??..
yahi ki
kal teri bahu ne
kisi charwahe ki bhed(SHEEP)
gaayab kar dee
aur wo tab se roye jaa raha hai
to main kya karun
use jaake kaho
bhed wapas kar de
nahi to toofan phir se wapas aayega...
wo phir hansi..
aur tokri ki saari choodiyan rone lagi
main nahi jaaunga...
chahe kuch bhi ho jaaye
tujhe jaana padega
na gaya to
toofan aayega!
meri bala se...
tujhe phir dariya mein kashti utaarni padegi
zindgiyon ka shauda karne jaana padega
phir toofan ke baad ki duniya
jaisi ki taisi ho jaayegi
aur phir main teri haamla bahu ko choodiyan pahnaane aaungi.

main maare dar ke kaamp raha tha...
aisa kaise ho sakta hai
ye daayan hogi...wo boli
tum phir galti kar rahe ho...
abhi dariya mein ghaas ug aayee hai
wahan bilkul paani nahi hai
saare patthar
dariya ke kinare
kaagaz ki tarah udte rahte hain


aur kai baar
bhedon ki peeth par baith ke
unhe chhot pahuchate hain.
unse kaho
wo
wahan se utrein
ghaas pighalne waali hai
aur saari dariya
ghaas ke pighalte hee barf se dhak jaayegi


meri aankhon me suiyan chubhni shuri ho gayee
dhaage phir lambe ho gaye
usne kaha
keemat do
kis cheez ki?
teri bahu ne meri teen choodiyan tod dee thi

mere paas kuch bhi nahi hai
main gidgidaya
to teen zindgiyan de... kaise doon..?
mujhe nahi maloom
teri duniya
tere log
teri zindgi
mujhe keemat chahiye...!!!
maine kaha........mujhe wapas karegi?
usne kaha kya?
dariya!
uske pahle ka toofan
aur meri D............dddddddddd

wo khilkhilayeee
aur tokri mein rakhi saari choodiyan rone lagi...
usne kaha...
dariya mein ghaas pighalni shuru ho gayi...
ab phir toofan aayega...
.usne tokri kee kuch choodiyan khaa lee...
aur uske pairon ke neeche ki ghaas pighalni shuru ho gayi
wo doob gayi..
par choodiyon ke rone ki aawaj lagaataar badhti ja rahi hai.

....phone ki ghanti baji
haan.....
1-6 office mein meeting hai
aajka lunch cancle
main raat mein phone karungi
khaana kha lena
luv u
luv u 2

...........aur tumne phone kaat diya tha.

Dr Neeraj Kumar ke liye..........



main apne aap se woob gaya hun....
aisa socha nahi
mujhe aisa laga.

baahar aaya
aur tumhe phone laga diya
tumne phone kaat diya
bheetar wapas gaya
aur phir laga
main apne aap se woob gaya hun.

ab tak tumhara phone aa gaya
haan kya baat thi?
pahle socha na kahun
phir socha kyon na kahun?
tum kahti rahti ho
mujhe har cheez bata diya karo
aur maine kah diya
main khud se woob gaya hun!!

paagal ho gaye ho?
nahi to
phir aisa kyon sochte ho?
kaisa?
ki apne se woob gaya hun?
kitne paaglon ko jaanti ho
jo apne se woob gaye hain?

dekho
tumhari ghanti aayi thi
main kuch zaruri kaam kar rahi thi
kaat di
phir socha
shaayad tumne kisi zaruri kaam se phone kiya ho?
isliye dobara se kar liya
to kaat do!
kya?
phone!


















kyon?
maine kuch bhi zaruri batane ke liye phone nahi kiya tha?

tum chhoti see baat ka bura maante ho
maine kab maana?
abhi!
naa
main to apne aap se woob gaya hun
socha....sabse pahle tumhe bata doon....






kal mujhse aake milo
sab sahi ho jaayega
kuch kharab kab hua?
jo theek hoga
zindgi waisee kee waisee hai.

tumne shave kee!
nahi.
kyon?
har paanch minute mein badh jaati hai.
kal mujhse milne aate waqt karoge?
nahi....nahi karoonga.
belt bhi nahi lagaoonga
bilkul taiyaar nahi hoonga...

kyon?
duniya achchi nahi lagti kya?
achchi lagti hai!
kai baar bahut achchi lagti hai..
uske paas naukri hai
formal shirts hain
tie hai
polishd joote hain
polishd language hai
combed hair hai













style hai..
bolne,chalne aur behave karne ki.

tumhare paas bhi to ye saari cheezen hain!
tum hans dee
naa maine saari utaar ke kone mein rakh dee hai....
tum aur tej hansi
tum poore paagal ho...
main paagal hota to apne se kaise woobta?

faaltu baatein baad mein
kal tum mujhse milne aa rahe ho..bas!
bas!....aur tumne phone kaat diya.

phone ki ghanti baj rahi thi
utha ke phone kaan pe lagaya..
tumne daanta.....
kitni der se tumhara phone try kar rahi hoon?
ek baar mein uthate kyon nahi ho..
mujhe jhapki aa gayi thi......
shaam ke 4 baje hee tumhe jhapki aati hai..
achcha bhaag ke aao..
main tumhe kisi se milwana chahti hoon....
D......dddddddddd
main kuch nahi sunna chahti....
aur haan SHAVE karke aana.

aur tumne phone kaat diya tha.

sawalon ki marzi nahi hoti...........

aakshie aur 2b ke liye..........









aaj shaam kai duniya ke log ikatthe hue
achchi
aur alag baat yeh thi
ki sabki apni duniya thi.



koi kisi ki duniya mein nahi tha
kisi ke bharose nahi
koi saath nahi
aur ghanton koi baat nahi.

phir talkhi tooti
mujhe laga
abhi baat hogi
sab baat karenge
cheezen khulengi
koi apnapan layega
koi parayepan mein chutkiyan lega
phir hansi hogi
thatthe honge
aur mausam ka mizaz badlega.

aisa kuch bhi nahi hua..
pahle ne bolne se mana kiya
doosre ne nazrein milane se
teesre ne naak sikodi
chauthe ne bhauyein marodi
phir baaki ke sabne peeth dikha di.




maine socha
sabne aisa kyon kiya
kya unke paas kahne ko sachmuch kuch nahi tha?
aisa tha agar
to unke ishaare?
unke chehre ?
chup hone chahiye ..
sab to bol rahe the..
.siwaye unke honton ke?

koi bada sawal nahi hai?
to koi bada jawab bhi nahi hoga shaayad?
zindgiyan beet jaati hain
aur hum ek-doosre ki taraf
peeth kiye baithe rahte hain
is intzaar mein ki abhi wo kuch poochega
aur hum uska jawab denge?



hum saalon tak chup rahte hain
saalon tak intzaar karte hain
ek mauke ki talash mein
jab hum apni marzi ka jawab denge....

sawalon ki marzi nahi hoti
sawal karne walon ki bhi marzi nahi hoti
wo be-marzi ke
bune jaate hain
pooche jaate hain
is tark ke saath
ki wo shaayad sawal hone ki keemat chuka rahe hain
ek prayschit....
gaddhe jaane ka..
bune jaane ka..
kuredne ka..
talashne ka.
.aur phir takleef dene ka!
sawalon ke ant mein ek takleef.


shaam mein saare log
aise kai sawalon ko bunte hue
ek doosre ki taraf peeth kiye
chup-chaap baithe rahe
is talash mein
ki sabki baari aayegi
sabke sawal aayeinge
aur phir
sabke jawab.
shaayad yahi wajah thi
aaj shaam koi kisi se kuch nahi bola
ye alag baat hai
aaj shaam kai duniya ke log ikathhe hue.

.....beeti raat SHIMLE mein barf padi thi

anurag kashyap aur 2b ke liye--

main aksar is sadak pe aake
khada hota hoon
phir palat ke dekhta hun
us sadak ki taraf
jispe tangi takhti pe likha hai
ye sadak aage nahi jaati.


sadak wahi hai
jispe main khada hun
sirf muh modne bhar se
likha padhne mein aata hai
ki sadak aage nahi jaati.

fir saamne dekhta hun
usi sadak ki taraf
jispe bina likhe
padhne mein aata hai
ye sadak zindgi ki taraf jaati hai.

cigarette jalata hun
kahin koi galti hui
ya galat raashte pe aake khada ho gaya.

seene mein dard uthta hai
khaansi aati hai
jaise tumne jore ki thaap seene pe maari ho
aur main bolta hun
aise nahi maarte
mera dil kamzor hai
aur tum hansti ho
dil kamzor hai?
aur mujhse ISHQ karte ho?

maine kaha
dil ka kamzor hona ishq ki pahli shart hai?
cigarette bujh gayi kya?
ya muh mein ab tak nahi lagayi
jalayee bhi?
dibbi mein thee bhi
jeb mein haath bhi daala kya?
nikali wahan se?

khair jeb mein
us dibbi mein
aakhri cigarette thi
wo bhi tooti thi
maachis ki teeli ka masala toota tha
shaayad jalata to bhi na jalti

over-coat ko tatola
poori tarah se bheeg gaya hun
thandi hawa bhi hai
aur toofan bhi
shaayad shimle mein barf padi hogi ?
shaayad!
tum apne hotel ke kamre se nikal ke
reception pe aayee hogi
shikayat karne
ki A.C kamra garm kyon nahi kar raha.?

over-coat phir tatoli
kaafi barf jama thi..
poori coat Shimle se jyada barfeeli thi.
par badan bheeg raha tha
pasheene se lathpath

tumne dawayein lee
neeli waali goli?
hari to subah khaani thi....
safed wali tab..
aur Laal wali?
tum khud se kha lena
tab main shimle mein hoongi

phone kar dena?
nahi kar paungi..
kyon?
ab tum kamati ho?
shimle mein phone nahi hai kya?
ya tumhe fikr nahi ?
ki mujhe dawa khaani hai?

koi jawab nahi
san-nataaaa
thode aansooo
subkiyan
bus.

bheed jama thi
subah ki talkhi thi
raat ko giri barf pighal rahi thi
log over-coat mein haath daale
ikat-tha the.

ek ne doosre ko aawaj di
kya hua?
dosra door se chillaya
koi mar gaya hai?
kahan?
SADAK AAGE NAHI JAATI WAALE LAMP POST KE NEECHE.

pahla bola...
THANDH SE MARA HOGA.
doosra bola..
beeti raat SHIMLE mein barf padi thi.

...jab bahut der tak HIROSHIMA nahi aaya

jab bahut der tak HIROSHIMA nahi aaya
DR. ASHOK CHAKRADHAR aur TWO-B ke liye.......tumne meri aankhein cheen leeaur mujhse kahaudhar jaake khade ho jao jahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.main bahut der takek takusi raah pebina nigah ke khada thakyonki tumne kaha thaudhar jaake khade ho jaojahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.HIROSHIMA nahi aayegaek bachcha chillataseeti bajata nikal gaya.phir ek jawan aadmi apni cycle se pareshaan aadmiapni utri chain kochadhane ke baad bolaHIROSHIMA nahi aayegaaur phir ghanti bajata nikal gaya.phir ek ladki gujri shaayar thi woshaayad...gunguna rahi thigungunate hue boli HIROSHIMA nahi aayega.main pareshaan hairaanagar HIROSHIMA nahi aayato jaunga kahan.aankhein nahi hainapna shaher nahi haiapne log nahi hainaur tumne kaha thaudhar jaake khade ho jaojidhar HIROSHIMA aanewala hai.HIROSHIMA nahi aaya aur sadiyan beet gayeinlogon ne kahna shuru kiyatum bhi kiski baaton mein ulajh gayekisi ladki ki kya?achanak sannata cha gayakisi ladki ki kya?aawaj goonjti rahikaano tak daud ke aatiphir sarpat chali jaatikisi ladki ki kya?mujhe yaad aayeewo shaamshadiyon pahlejab aankhein cheenne ke baadtumne kaha tha udhar jaake khade ho jaojidhar HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.maine apne badan ko tatolajism ko pahchanne ki koshish kiwo wahi nahi thakuch bhi to nahi thasiwayeus ek ret(sand)ke teele kejo achanak tatolne se dhasak karbaaloo ki tarahbikhar gaya.tumne mujhse jhoot kyon bolaapne se alag kyon kiyaaankhein kyon cheeni merius raashte pe le jaake kyon khada kiyajo tumse door thaus raashte se door thajidhar se HIROSHIMA gujraaur tumhe leke chala gaya.duniya sahi thi apni jagahwo ladki ko kabhi pahchaan nahi saktius ladki ko jo jab-jab HIROSHIMA gujrato bina bataye uske saath chali gayi.ek aadmi ko baalu ke teele pe khada kar ke.haan HIROSHIMA sadiyon mein ek baar aata haiaur wo ladki uske saath bina bataye chali jaati hai.aur main us ladki se pyar karta hoon.
DR. ASHOK CHAKRADHAR aur TWO-B ke liye.......

tumne meri aankhein cheen lee
aur mujhse kaha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.

main bahut der tak
ek tak
usi raah pe
bina nigah ke
khada tha
kyonki tumne kaha tha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jahan HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.

HIROSHIMA nahi aayega
ek bachcha chillata
seeti bajata
nikal gaya.

phir ek jawan aadmi
apni cycle se pareshaan aadmi
apni utri chain ko
chadhane ke baad bola
HIROSHIMA nahi aayega
aur phir ghanti bajata nikal gaya.

phir ek ladki gujri
shaayar thi wo
shaayad...
gunguna rahi thi
gungunate hue boli HIROSHIMA nahi aayega.

main pareshaan
hairaan
agar HIROSHIMA nahi aaya
to jaunga kahan.
aankhein nahi hain
apna shaher nahi hai
apne log nahi hain
aur tumne kaha tha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jidhar HIROSHIMA aanewala hai.

HIROSHIMA nahi aaya aur sadiyan beet gayein
logon ne kahna shuru kiya
tum bhi kiski baaton mein ulajh gaye
kisi ladki ki kya?

achanak sannata cha gaya
kisi ladki ki kya?
aawaj goonjti rahi
kaano tak daud ke aati
phir sarpat chali jaati
kisi ladki ki kya?

mujhe yaad aayee
wo shaam
shadiyon pahle
jab aankhein cheenne ke baad
tumne kaha tha
udhar jaake khade ho jao
jidhar HIROSHIMA aane wala hai.

maine apne badan ko tatola
jism ko pahchanne ki koshish ki
wo wahi nahi tha
kuch bhi to nahi tha
siwaye
us ek ret(sand)
ke teele ke
jo achanak tatolne se dhasak kar
baaloo ki tarah
bikhar gaya.

tumne mujhse jhoot kyon bola
apne se alag kyon kiya
aankhein kyon cheeni meri
us raashte pe le jaake kyon khada kiya
jo tumse door tha
us raashte se door tha
jidhar se HIROSHIMA gujra
aur tumhe leke chala gaya.

duniya sahi thi apni jagah
wo ladki ko kabhi pahchaan nahi sakti
us ladki ko
jo jab-jab HIROSHIMA gujra
to bina bataye uske saath chali gayi.

ek aadmi ko baalu ke teele pe khada kar ke.
haan HIROSHIMA sadiyon mein ek baar aata hai
aur wo ladki uske saath bina bataye chali jaati hai.
aur main us ladki se pyar karta hoon.

...magar gila na karein.

I loved Kateel Shifai(Pakistan) when I was a kid..
ANANDANA KAPOOR ke liye..jiski aawaz mein mere dard ko jazb karne ki taakat hai.....

WO dil hi kya jo tere milne ki dua na kare
main tujhe bhool ke zinda rahoon khuda na kare
rahega tera pyar saath zindgi ban-kar,
ye aur baat meri zindgi wafa na kareye
yeh theek hai nahi marta koi judai mein
khuda kisi se kisi ko magar juda na kare

suna hai unki mohabbat duayein deti hain
jo dil mein chot to khayein magar gila na karein

apne bahke kadmon ki saazish mein...............

aakshi ke liye,jo tamam baar NORAH JONES se jyada achchi lagti hai-----

tumne soch kar nahi bola..
aur maine bol kar nahi socha..!
us gujre fal-safe mein ..
jo tumne nahi bola
aur jo maine nahi socha..
wo us lamhe mein kaid hai
jo apni saakhon par deenaar ugati hain.
........
jo apne darakhton mein taarikh chupati hain
.......
...aur un gawahon ko muh mod lene ke liye bolti hain
...jo apne bahke kadmon ki saajish mein
...."MOHABBAT""ko jurm maante hain
aur hum dono ko ''jurmwar''

dono ki apni sajayein hain
apni bad-duayein bhi
jao kaid ho jao ,apni zindgiyon mein
aur jab kabhi muh dhone ke baad
aakhiri boond palkon pe chhipke ja baithe
to use ruei(cotton) ke halke faahe se
wahan se girane ki koshish karna.

....phir chhupana
jaise kuch hua hi na ho

...kai afsos jama ho jaate hain
aur kai zindgiyan kaid
sajayein girahbaan mein jhaank ke poochti hain
HEY! KIS JURM KE MAARFAT TUM YAHAN AAYE HO
aur wo pahli baar sar utha ke bolta hai..........
"MOHABBAT"

......aur Zindgi nikammi ho jaati hai

us ladki ke liye jo mujhe pyar nahi karti...aur TIGMANSHU
(TISHU) DHULIA ke liye jo mere liye bhagwan se kam nahi.

Bahke kadam ke kai saamyane hain..........

....haan kuch mein mohaabat hai,..

to kuch mohabbat mein ujde -veerane hain.

...wo aate hain,sajate hain....
............kahan kaise sab kuch sahi paate hain
hosho-hawaash mein kahan hoti hai mohabbat...
........aur jo mohabbat mein hain khud ko madhosh paate hain.

pyar utna bhi bura nahi hai
jitna tumne bana diya
aur jitna maine samajh liya
..phir wo kaun hain jo sadkon pe jaam takrate hain...?????

....Battiyon mein kaid karke roshni
battiyon ko bujha do
battiyan shor karti hain.

...kadmon me lapet ke thirkan
unhe sula do
wo saans lete hain
gajab dhaati hai zindgi jab thirakti hai
gajab dhaati hai dhadkan jab dhadkti hai

gajab dhaate hain sannaate ,jab Rooh kaampti hai
gajab dhaati hai Rooh jab Zindgi se alag hoti hai
....................
.....................AUR ZINDGI NIKAMMI HO JAATI HAI
jab tum kahti ho
"tum mujhe pyar nahi karti".

meri pasand.....chalo ek baar phir se ajnabi ban jaayein hum dono

meri pasand.........
Sahir Ludhiyanvi

चलो इक बार फिर से अजनबी बन जायें हम दोनो

ना मैं तुमसे कोई उम्मीद रखूँ दिलनवाज़ी की
ना तुम मेरी तरफ देखो गलत अन्दाज़ नज़रों से
ना मेरे दिल की धड़कन लड़खड़ाये मेरी बातों में
ना ज़ाहिर हो तुम्हारी कश्मकश का राज़ नज़रों से

चलो इक बार फिर से अजनबी बन जायें हम दोनो

तुम्हे भी कोई उलझन रोकती है पेशकदमी से
मुझे भी लोग कहते हैं कि ये जलवे पराये हैं
मेरे हमराह भी रुसवाईयां हैं मेरे माझी की
तुम्हारे साथ भी गुज़री हुई रातों के साये हैं

चलो इक बार फिर से अजनबी बन जायें हम दोनो

तारूफ रोग हो जाये तो उसको भूलना बेहतर
तालुक बोझ बन जाये तो उसको तोड़ना अच्छा
वो अफसाना जिसे अन्जाम तक लाना ना हो मुमकिन
उसे इक खूबसूरत मोड़ देकर छोड़ना अच्छा

चलो इक बार फिर से अजनबी बन जायें हम दोनो

muskurane ki aadat hai meri..................

meri bahan Neha Simlai,D aur Sanjay Mishra ke liye jinne mujhe ishq ki tamiz sikhayee.



Muskurane ki aadat hai meri........

kisi insaan pe nahi
kisi ke haalaat pe nahi
balki us mukurahat pe
jo kadua muskurati hai.

sach mein misri nahi hoti
hoti hogi to kabhi ghulti nahi
jubaan pe chipki mithaas ki dali
kabse utni hi badi hai
tabhi kahun kuch kahne kyon nahi deti
chup hone bhi to nahi
.
muskurane ki aadat hai meri.................

mana tabahi nahi laati muskurahat
zindgi bhi to nahi
sab kuch tahra hua sa rahta hai
mund aanch mein pakti pateeli ki tarah
kuch kachcha nahi rahta
to kuch pakne deti bhi to nahi.

muskurane ki aadat hai meri.................

udhar jaane pe muskurahat hai
udhar lautne pe muskurahat hai
kyon saans ki tarah rooh pe kabza jamaye
marne nahi deti
to jeene bhi to nahi.

muskurane ki aadat hai meri............

udhar kisi ke aagosh mein
koi kabse hontho(n)ko chupaye baitha hai
aankhon ki falak mein jaake dekh lo
wahan pyar nahi
to sharmindgi bhi to nahi.

muskurane ki aadat hai meri..........

kaise koi ANSHUMAN muskurane ki aadat ko chhod de
ishq ke beehad mein kitne gale hain
jo roondhe hain.....phir bhi raahgeer hain
haan agar wo ishq mein lut-te nahi
to bachte bhi to nahi.

muskurane ki aadat hai meri......

Ai Tum! Dard apna mujhe de do
hum hanste nahi
to rote bhi to nahi

Haan muskurane ki aadat hai meri.

thoda thaher jao tum.................

D .....agar tumhe yaad ho.

Thoda thaher jao tum.........
wo gair hote hain jo ek saans chale jaate hain.

Main roke leta tumhe apne paas hi....
gar,dehleez ke do aab na hote
raat hoti,par na din dobara
na adhoore khwab hote.

Hizr ke paar uthe sailaab ki ruswai...
kinaron pe khade ho jao..
kyonki, Zindgi ke haathon patwar nahi hote...

thoda thaher jao tum
wo gair hote hain jo ek saans chale jaate hain.

main wapas der se lauta.............

Rhythm ke liye…………….

Mai pichle kai saalon mein ghar nahi lauta
is dar se
ki baaju wale ghar ki chaukhat pe khada koi padosi
yeh na kah de
tumhara ghar kho gaya hai.

kya jawab doonga?
us padosi ko...
jo apne ghar ki chaukhat pe tabse khada hai..
jabse main apne ghar nahi lauta hun.

laaparwahi kahen ise
jisme hum kho jaate hain
ghar wapas nahi aate
ya laparwhi wo hoti hai
jisme hum bheetar hi bheetar
ghar tatolte rahte hain.

itne ghar,
itni deewarein
saari chatein apni uchaiyon ke bojh se dabi
khidkiyan dopahri mein besharm hawaon ke thapedon se unghti
aur jagane pe tilmilati
kiska ghar poochte ho
koi nahi rahta is naam ka yahan..
phir achanak aankh meenchte hue
haan ……udhar us gali mein jaakar dekh lo
jismein dheron madaar ug aayee hain.

shaayad mausam ke paas
us mausam ki aakhri kisht rahi ho
jiska kisi ne daam nahi lagaya
boliyan nahi chadhi
aur munasib jaankar
isi gali mein wo
apni redi/thela ulat kar bhaag gaya
yeh samajhkar
ki ,is khep ko sadna likha hai
jaahir hai
wahan duniya nahi thi
uske puchattar nahi the
wo jhola nahi tha
...jo sab taaja aur hara kharidta hai.

us gali mein jaane par
ek makan dikhta hai
jiske darwaje pe saankal aur aligarhi taala dikhta hai
par wo darwaja kabhi nahi dikhta
jo bheetar ki taraf khulta tha.

jab wo chhota tha
peet-ta tha us darwaje ko
chatpata tha agar us darwaje ko khulne mein der lagti
aaj ghanton ho gaye
bahar aake khade hue
par wo darwaja bheetar ki taraf nahi bahar ki taraf khulta hai.

wo jaanta hai
yeh usi ka ghar hai
par ye wahi darwaja nahi hai
ek paiir mein keechad sani hui chappal
aur haathon mein doosre paiir ki tooti hui chappal dekhkar
khilkhilata hua darwaja
aaj badbadata hai
aankhein kyon meechta hai
kyon aisa lagta hai
jahan chehra hota tha
aaj wahan jhurriyon ke neeche tahkhana hai
jo mujhe batana nahi
mujhse chhupana chahta hai

daudte-haanfte charon taraf se ghar ke kai chakkar lagata hun
us firangi ki tarah
jo maachis ki teeli mein
neebu ki pattiyan daal bhar dene se ban jaati thi
par wo darwaja kahin nahi milta.

mann poochta hai
kya baaju ke kabze us chatpatahat ko bhool gaye
ya phir shaayad wo itne boodhe ho gaye
wo gali ke madar ko kaatne ke liye hansiye ko nahi utha paaye..
aur aaaj jab wo lauta
to aadam- kad madaron ne
ghar ka raashta roondh diya tha.

wo nahi jaanta
ghar ka dum ghut raha tha
ya ghar ka dum ghut chuka tha
haan shaayad wapas aane mein bahut der kar di thi.

OH,GAWD!....................

.........I don't want to sleep
even when i fall asleep.
lonely,serene & sabbatical
promises made to be broken.
.........Why on earth a 'God'...?
unkempt,shabby,abusive as a 'frog'.
Why on earth 'cow-dung'..?
pelted on the neighbour's whitewashed wall
just in the process to achieve a make-believe 'GOD'.

.........I don't want to brag
even when i'm on cloud nine
with God,just after finishing my life
which i did find so gorgeous
said 'NO' to carry the process...
.......then taking an overview of life..
along side God,doing my camera..
and me,tickling HIM in his tummy.

.........I don't want want to lie
even when there are palm leaves to hide the truth
i have seen God naked
making love to a 'wall'
presumably a 'Chinese one'
but hackneyed and abondoned
lost bricks here and there
in order of appearance
and then from the other side
protuberances & parts of female organs
peeping from the pores
in order to compliment 'their GOD'.

........I don't want want to shout
even when i'm on the uppers
one day while having an ice-cream
i suggested to GOD to play my 'life drawing model'
something senseless,....ridiculous...
wanted to sketch MINK'S ORGASM
which obviously longer than GOD'S.
......so where was the heat...?
which could blow the fireplace
in order to heat up GOD
to get the desired result(gross)
GOD growled,shivered and stumbled
but couldn't afford to achieve 'MINK'S ORGASM'
though ice-cream had deiced..
on my face and clothes ages before.

.........Now I growled..
What the 'F**K' r U doing....?
GOD growled likewise..
YOU can't afford to have an ICECREAM..
so what if i couldn't afford to have 'MINK's ORGASM'

.. .since then i've never wanted to sleep.

...............i see nothing rational.

......I see nothing rational,
except a hive and,
a cluster of honey-bees.

..when the Christmas light slows down..
losing in the hands of a nemesis
named twi-light(or tonal-equality)
here come three musketeers..
treading on a tight rope
promising a tough fight
but losing lives single handedly..
in the hands of virtuosity.

...rope was not at fault
even the bamboos were not at fault
not even the people gathered around.
it was their hearts..
which when became laughing stock,
while treading on a tight rope
they found people mocking at them
mumbling about their pink cheeks and..
hammered chins.
they couldn't bear the laughter
they couldn't bear the whine
lost guns in the hands of 'speaking mimes'
so what if there was a' rational gun'
a rational mind to trigger that off
there were hands
there were palms
reading the line of life
and then again,crossing the line of brain,
always a line of heart.
which too doesn't listen to the musketeers..
people with 'arms'.

....but it listens to a perpetual bee-humming
a conundrum of its sort
and it understands a tale wagging dance
a method in the loop of its sorts.

.....A hive is hive
made in heaven
it seems as the honey-bees are always with plans.
a promising future..
between well structured walls
a shell of its kind
blind in love with honey-bees
and inclined for the 'sweet-sauces'.
......nothing penetrates the mood
except a bee trigger
why is there a method in the hive?
why is there a dance in the bee?
why is 'relief' so uncertain?
why is 'scent' so unconscious?
that while giving a peck on its cheek..
flowers don't wither
flowers don't flower
they just remain 'flowers'
dressed in 'indecency'
unwrapped in 'limits'
making love with a honey-bee
moaning,to get soaked in trigger.
.....a 'calyx' working as a nail
a 'corolla' working as a sheet
'pigments'working as stains
and then a lot of emotional fluctuations
caused by the 'breeze'
keeping the process in' ease'
so how was the 'day'...?
how was the 'night'....?
how was the moment..?
and how was the ''love-pride"..

.......Love-pride came as a 'scar ' on the flower's cheek
a painful sigh in the lover's breath
that night ,the flower clamped its petals
it never came to see another moon-light
a glycerine one
a white.
........botanists rumoured this 'an affair'
twi-lights mocked this 'a fling'
wild-talents peeped in the matter and
then whisked away....
No one went to the flower
to feel the 'pulse'
to smell the 'odour'
to smell the 'irrationality'..
which resurfaces the flower as a 'flower'.

........Flower had nothing 'constructed'
except the 'faith'
to fall in love..
and then remain silent.
........SINCE THEN I SEE NOTHING RATIONAL
EXCEPT A HIVE
AND A CLUSTER OF HONEY-Bees.

ZEBRA....................crossing

.....wo wahan thi, jahan use veqtigat taur(personally) par
nahi hona tha
wo wahan nahi thi, jahan use samajik taur par
hona tha
wo bhee(n)d mein sabse aage thi,wo wahan thi
jahan use ro(n)ka gaya tha
wo pariwar mein sabse peeche thi, jahan use
aage aana tha

......wo kis parivesh mein parityakta(deserted) thi
kin sambhawnaon mein shithilta(lazy) thi..
rozi-roti,choolha-chakki,daana-paani ya ....
ek keet ki tarah
daanto(n) mein phansi,kabse''tooth-pick" ke saath
zirah mein lagi..

.......malal is baat ka ki aashiq ke saath nahi bhaagi
dwand is baat ka ki Bambai aur Dilli mein pali hoti..
to ek zuban paati
jo maa-baap se kahin zyada apni hoti
afsos is baat ka ki numais mein......
sirf AURAT ka sharir kyon bikta hai?
sandeh ki ek khusboo kachche aur pakke gosht ko..
kaise alag kar sakti hai?
hawayein paseena sukhaane aur bahane ka shagal
kaise paalti hain?
dhuan uth bhi sakta hai......to baith bhi sakta hai!

.......wo pak gayi......'UFF'
'HARAMI'....................phir gaali di.
apni aurat ko Raani bana ke rakhta hai aur mujhe 'RANDI'

.......wo raaste mein mili thi
raat ke paune ya adhai..
use sadak ke ZEBRA-CROSSING ke maayne nahi pata...
'decency' aur 'limit' bhi nahi
'green' aur 'yellow' bhi nahi
RED LIGHT???
haan wo yahin se chalti
rukti
aur phir chalti hai....!

...........HAAN WO IMAAN-DAAR THI.